Tuesday, September 25, 2007

It's that time of month again. The time of the month a woman can sit here at 10 am and eat double stuffed peanut butter oreos, and not give a shit. When a woman can say shit like "Your hugs feel selfish" and who cares if her husband doesn't understand what she means, SHE knows what she means, and stop hugging her with your selfish hugs. The hugs that scream "When are we going to do it?"

September has been kind of a weird month for me. I'm feeling better, but the amount of "me" time I have needed has been insatiable. Once the kids are in bed, I spend hours, either on the computer, or playing Nintendo. No longer am I spending time with my husband like I should.

Last night I was trying to think of WHAT could cause me to feel this way, and the only thing I could put my finger on that is now different is babysitting. Taking care of two extra kids, especially for a woman who doesn't really LIKE kids, is just to much for me to take. Then I feel like a weakling because it's only for two and a half hours a day, so why can't I handle it like I feel I should be able to?

1 comment:

Shannon said...

Sandi. Cut yourself some slack. You have two kids of your own. I myself have never been a babysitter either kwim? I like to watch my kids and other than that I like kids that I can have over that go play and leave me alone and are good to my kid. I will fix them food and drinks and start a movie or whatever assistance they need, then GO PLAY. Now MY kids? I'm all good there. But taking care of kids that NEED me all the time gets tiresome. I gave birth to the ones I wanted to take care of. Other than my grandbaby who I still don't want all the time...I'm good with the ones I had myself. If you don't like it and its making you depressed stop doing it if you can. Its not worth it.