My plan is to try and get on here and write everyday again. Even if it's just a list of things I did or need to do, so that I can practice my typing.
It's one of my favorite times of day, right after Tony and Aislinn leave, and it's just me and a sleeping kid upstairs. The possibilities are endless at this point, although today is definitely go back to bed day. I knew I'd get sucked into Battlestar Galactica at some point last night so I cleaned up before I sat down to watch, so I don't have much to do today. My one and only goal today was to get on the phone and STAY on the phone with the clinic to get seen by a doctor. I realized the other day that my RX for my anti-depressants had expired, even with one refill left. Why do they do that? It makes no sense. I mean, yeah I've skipped a day here and there, maybe even a few in a row, because a girls gotta poop SOMETIME, and if I skip it, within the day, I'm going. But, I skipped a whole months worth? I find that hard to believe.
The one thing that just irks me to no end about being here in Virginia is medical coverage being a military family. I have to call a 1-800 number to schedule an appointment for the clinic that is literally, 8 minutes from my house. They tell me "The only available appointment is *insert date two weeks from when you are calling*" Which of course is too long a wait. Then they transfer you to the clinic down the street to see if they can squeeze you in, where you wait for some unGodly amount of time, even though the line insists that you're second in queue and that your call is VERY important to them. You try to be a champ and hang in there, but usually after ten minutes your four year old has done something that needs your immediate attention with a first aid kit, and/or a fire extinguisher. So you hang up, and promise yourself that you will call later, but you call later and the automated voice tells you that you're now 8th in queue and you remembered the search and rescue mission you had to deploy for the turtle the LAST time you were on the phone when you were second in queue and you hang up, reassuring yourself that you will call later in the day at a not so busy time, but really the only time you have to time to call is at those busy times, just like everyone else. Then you die from the withdrawal symptoms of not having your anti -depressants, or from your family shoving you in the oven for being such a bitch and being on the phone all the time, instead of caring for them or both. If this is universal healthcare, hmmmm I don't know.
Anyway, after being on hold for almost 30 minutes (I was second in queue by the way) I almost wept with joy when it rang through to the nurse. I can go in tomorrow at 9:40. But, here is the other little snag. Military run clinics don't want you to bring your kids to your appointments. Single parents are forced to make a decision to find and possibly PAY someone to watch their kids, or go without being seen, where as at a civilian dr, they don't care, as long as they get paid. You could bring seven clowns in your vagina in with you and have them pop out and do a little act right there in the room, and I'd bet there is a medical billing code for it.
But, it's cool though. When I was on the phone with the nurse this morning, she was luckily on the same anti as me, and knew the withdrawal symptoms can be a bitch. Trying to function with a head both fuzzy and swimmy, and that sends little annoying shocks through your head is NOT fun. So, I go in tomorrow, and I asked about Jonny and she said "Hey, you do what you gotta do" right on sistah.
Speaking of my anti depressants, more and more I've been thinking of trying to wean off of them. Of course this comes with a whole gamut of what ifs, and all that. It's been a year and a half, and although I am ok with the possibility of being on them forever, I think I'd like to try and see if I can make it without them. Like I said a girl's got to poop. Also, I'd like to desire my husband once again. Last night I laid there in bed, and I just put my hand on Tony's chest and then his face, and the noises he made from me just touching him, the pure pleasure he had in my TOUCH, well I miss that. I want to feel that way again. It wasn't sexual touching, just rubbing his chest and face, and he made it seem like it felt so good. He tried to do the same to me, just hold me and I just got really hot and sweaty, which sounds like it was working, but it was just really, really warm in our bedroom.
Anywhoo. So, I feel like I accomplished a lot today already and it's only 8 am. Jonny was up last night kind of late in his room, so I'm hoping he's good for at least another hour or two of sleeping so that I can catch up on my sleep, get some school work done (that I'm oddly enjoying, save that for another post) and watch the rest of season two for BSG. I got lucky, because even though the Navy has spent probably hundreds of thousands of dollars to train husband in electronics, he STILL doesn't know how to use the DVR properly, and instead of recording all the new shows for BSG, he recorded ALL the shows, and yesterday they did a season two marathon, which I was going to go and rent today at Blockbuster, but now I get to watch for "free". (I mean we do pay for the DVR services) Military training at it's finest people.